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Overcome negative thoughts1/31/2024 If you’re struggling with your mental health, reach out to your primary care provider. It’s important that you don’t need to deal with these negative thoughts alone. It could be healing to talk it out, which could start to turn things around. Expressing yourself verbally can be a huge weight off your chest and help you keep things in perspective. Voice your fears, concerns, and feelings with a trusted confidante. If you go through these steps and notice that you’ve been having more ‘bad’ thoughts than ‘good’ ones, it could be a good idea to talk to someone about it. He says that while this can be quite helpful, it won’t work for everyone, so give it a shot and see if it works for your brain. You could take a worksheet approach and deconstruct your thoughts as they come up. “Sometimes it helps to write a negative thought down and go through the previous steps,” says Bertagnolli. Bertagnolli says “don’t dwell on it.” You can take the feedback, accept the negative experience for what it is, and move forward. Maybe, for instance, you received negative feedback from a boss. Perhaps the negative thought is reflective of your reality. Ask yourself, will this make a difference in one year, five years or 10 years from now?” Don’t believe everything you think. “Just observe that you are having a thought and assure yourself that thoughts come and go. They’re not all rooted in or reflective of your reality. Bertagnolli posits, “Can you just accept the thought as a thought?” That sounds a bit like a riddle, but at its core it’s reminding yourself that you will have tons of thoughts a day (at least 6,000!),every day. Sticking to the previous example, instead of thinking you’re terrible at your job because you’ll ‘never learn’ what you need to, try inserting a new realistic and optimistic thought like, ‘While I may be having problems with this assignment, with a little more dedicated time, I'll get it.’ĭr. “Insert a more accurate, realistic, or fair thought,” suggests Bertagnolli. Add some logic and evidence into the mix. Have you learned something recently that seemed hard at first? Remind yourself that you can learn, and have in the past. You could start to challenge the thought. Are you struggling with your confidence or self-esteem perhaps? Or are you feeling overwhelmed or under supported? “Is this thought helping me, or holding me back?”įor instance, if you’re having negative thoughts about being terrible at your job, and you identify a thought like ‘I’m never going to learn X component of my job,’ you could then dig into the root of that thought. “Ask yourself, ‘Is this thought completely accurate?’” Dr. Let’s deconstruct the thought, and challenge it. Using your self awareness, it’ll become easier and easier to ‘catch’ your thoughts as they come. This might be a bit challenging at first, but think of it this way: have you ever thought about buying a particular car, and suddenly start seeing that car everywhere? What you focus on will start to become more apparent. If you can catch yourself, write it down, and set it aside for some assessment later. “Ask yourself, what is the thought that is upsetting me the most?” He posits. What’s your internal monologue sounding like? Is it fearful, or cynical? “Tune into your thoughts, particularly if you’re noting an unpleasant mood state.” In other words, if you’re feeling low, start keeping track of your thoughts a bit more mindfully. Ready to reset your mindset? Bertagnolli shares his best tips for reframing negative thoughts.Īwareness is the first step! Suppressed thoughts often bubble back up, so instead of pushing them away, recognize and observe without judgment. Have you found yourself thinking in any of these ways? Let’s take a look at some ways to manage them and steer toward healthy optimism. Emotional reasoning (confusing thoughts with facts): ‘I feel like a bad mother, so I must be a bad mother.’.Examples: ‘I should never say no to a friend,’ or, ‘I must never let my emotions show.’ Shoulds and musts: These can create unrealistic expectations that we can never meet.Confusing possibility with probability (catastrophic in nature): ‘If I get in an airplane, it will crash,’ - while crashing is possible, what are the odds of it actually happening?.All-or-nothing thinking: Either I am 100% perfect or I am a failure.“Whatever kind they are, they are almost always unhelpful and can contribute to unnecessary distress and a negative mood.” He says they can take the form of “unhelpful shortcuts,” that don’t make space for more logical processing. “We can have all sorts of thoughts,” says Bertagnolli. Because these thoughts can be pervasive, it’s important to understand the parameters of this mindset - there’s not just one type of negative thought!
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